My Baby Boy

Baby boy was born on Friday, November 13, 2009 at 5:21 a.m. He was 6 pounds 15 ounces and 18.5 inches long. He had black hair and eyes that will, no doubt, be blue and he smelled like earthy maple. On Monday, November 16, 2009 at approximately 8:30 p.m., I, Baby Boy's birth mother, placed him lovingly into the arms of a social worker to take to his adoption family. The last noise I heard him make was 2 sneezes. The song that played on the radio as my mom drove me home was "A Christmas Song". It never occurred to me until that moment how lonely of a song it is, "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire..." it sounds lonely. Well, that was my thought at the time.
This blog is not about chestnuts roasting, or yuletide carols being sung. This blog is the journey of a birth mother after she gives up her first born child and how she will find herself. I've kept a journal to give to my son one day, it's about our time together while I was pregnant with him and it's also about me, his birth mother. I hope that it will answer the questions he'll have about who I am and where he came from and why I made the decision to place him for adoption, and it explains how hard that decision was, though the decision was no where near as difficult as the moment when I left him with the social worker.
One hope I have for this blog, is that it will educate people and help them to understand that adoption is a gift to all involved and not something that should be hushed and hidden. Adoption is a blessing to all involved. It gives those not ready to parent another chance to achieve the goals they wanted, but lost sight of along the way. It helps build a family for couples who aren't able to have children of their own and are desperate for a family. And, most importantly it's a chance at a better life for the child that comes into the world to parent's who realize, all to soon, that they aren't ready to be parents. Adoption is a gift. That's what I hope this blog will help people to understand.